Christmas Crackers

Especially at the end of a semester, right before Christmas, impatiently awaiting a pay day, sometimes life gets heavy. And after a few nights of Netflix and Diet Dr. Pepper hibernation/ recovery, I’m remembering the sweetness of this incredible life.

Hemingway said, “Try to learn to breathe deeply, really to taste food when you eat, and when you sleep, really sleep. Try as much as possible to be wholly alive with all your might, and when you laugh, laugh like hell. And when you get angry, get good and angry. Try to be alive. You will be dead soon enough.”

I read that today while I was eating a cracker. It was a delicious cracker with this homemade, cheesy goodness kind of spread that one of our clients brings to the office every Christmas. There were crumbles of pecans on top. Pecans are my most favorite nut. When our family would spend Thanksgiving in St. George with Grandma and Grandpa Johnson I would go on walks with my dad and we would eat pecans right off the neighbor’s tree. They were soft and fruity and fresh. We would collect enough to make Dixie salad. Fresh whipped cream, pomegranates, apples, grapes, pecans, the old green carpet in Grandma Milne’s house, setting the table with Grandma’s silver, Grandpa in his recliner with the football game on, ball cap pulled low over his eyes.

I thought about my daddy’s face in Grandpa’s room at the care center while Matt played the guitar and Mom and I sang “Country Road”. And then he fell asleep.

I remembered when Mom had surgery just after Christmas, years ago, and Grandma and Grandpa were up visiting. Grandpa brought Mom a tin of cookies, but he had opened it in the car and eaten a few before they reached Mom’s room.

That was a pretty great cracker.